What to Talk to Your Missionary About on P-Day

If you’ve ever gotten on a call with your missionary and hit that first awkward silence, you’re not alone. It’s such a weird feeling! You have SO much to say, and also somehow nothing to say, all at the same time. You don’t want to waste your one call of the week on small talk, but you also don’t want to grill them with fifteen questions and a family drama recap. It’s a balance, friend.

After a lot of trial and error (and a few calls I definitely could’ve done better), I’ve learned there’s a sweet spot between “here’s what happened at the grocery store” and “how’s your testimony of the Atonement growing.” Both matter, but here’s what I’ve found actually gets the conversation flowing instead of dead air and a one-word answer.

Ideas for what to talk about:

• Ask about a specific companion, not just “how’s it going.” “What’s something your companion does that makes you laugh?” gets you a story every time.
• Ask what’s hard right now — not in a heavy way, just genuinely curious. Missionaries want to feel like someone sees the real thing, not just the highlight reel.
• Bring up a scripture or conference talk that made you think of them. It shows you’re paying attention to their life, not just reporting on yours.
• Ask about a specific friend or recent convert (without pushing for details they can’t share). “How’s that family doing?” means so much more than “how’s teaching going?”
• Tell them one specific, funny thing from home — not a full week’s rundown. Just one good story!
• Ask what they’re learning about themselves. Missions change people in ways they don’t always notice in the moment. This question invites reflection.
• Bring up something small and normal, like a new recipe you tried or a show you’re watching. It reminds them home is still home.
• Ask what they need — literally. Socks, a talk, prayers for a specific thing. Missionaries are notoriously bad at asking for help.
• Share something you’re working on spiritually. It flips the script from “parent checking in” to “two people on the same journey,” which is honestly the whole point.

A few things to skip, at least most weeks: family drama, guilt trips about how much you miss them, and anything that’s going to sit in their head all week when they need to be focused on the work in front of them. P-day calls are for connection, not for processing.

Here’s the thing- P-day communication isn’t really about information. It’s about reminding them they’re loved, they’re doing something that matters, and home is still standing exactly where they left it. You don’t need the perfect question. You just need to show up, ask something real, and let them know you’re proud of them. That’s the whole assignment!